I’ve been doing a lot of reading about Europe in the Middle Ages, because walking around in 13th century castles makes you want to read about how in the hell they got big fucking rocks 200 feet in the air but didn’t understand that maybe you shouldn’t divert sewage into your drinking water.
There are many references to various “itinerant courts”. Henry II’s “itinerant court”. Pope Clement V’s “itinerant court”. I picture a VW camping van at a rest stop and a lot of people in tights standing around a folding table on which you would spread a vinyl tablecloth for a picnic. Which I think means I totally get history.
What I like about politics in the Middle Ages are things like “Henry mobilized the Poitou nobles for an attack on the French king. None of them wanted to do it though, so nothing happened and everybody went home.” Standing armies weren’t a thing then! So every time the king wanted to invade something, he had to walk there, trying to get people to come with him to war along the way. It’s like the world’s worst conga line. Just as embarrassing and horrible as a conga line someone tries to get you to join at your cousin’s wedding, but instead of it ending with you pretending you have to use the restroom (my patented method for leaving unsavory situations, because no one can dispute it), it ends with you dying in Jerusalem.
What’s the point of this blog post? I took a bunch of Benadryl because I’m allergic to France and a mosquito bit me and my arm swelled up a whole bunch and it’s gross and itchy and the Benadryl makes me feel loopy. Oh yeah, we went to Avignon and saw the Palais des Papes!
Palais des Papes!
Many interesting things have happened in Avignon featuring people with awesome names such as Childebert, Gundobad and Clothilde. It is probably most famous for hosting the papacy for awhile. At the beginning of the 14th century, Pope Clement V moved his itinerant court (!) from Rome to Avignon. He built the Palais des Papes, from which he and the next 6 popes (and 2 antipopes!) ruled. After about 70 years in Avignon, the papacy was moved back to Rome, prompting the Great Schism, which was when everyone in Europe claimed to be pope. Avignon remained under papal control after that, though the Palace more or less slowly deteriorated for the next 400 years until the French Revolution, when it deteriorated faster.
The Palais des Papes is extremely grand and enormous. Also women weren’t allowed in it. :/
There are modern art installations in castles sometimes. I think this can be a cool idea but I hate this sculpture. It interrupts my ability to think of the pope walking through this courtyard wearing an enormous hat.
Here is a picture of the very beautiful Virgin Mary statue on top of Avignon cathedral next to the Palais des Papes. In case God is Catholic, I have nothing further to say about it other than that it is very nice. Amen.
Working title of next post: I Keep Waking Up in the Middle of the Night, Forgetting Where I Am and Thinking I’m in a Coffin, What Does That Mean
– C